Recipe for Togetherness
They started out as colleagues at work and ended up as partners for life. Pune-based corporate couple Rohan Shashidharan and his better half Shristi Bhatia, believe that every enduring relationship is built on the foundation of friendship and nurtured with open communication
Adining table has stories to tell, you know. Of togetherness, family, recipes, celebration, of diversity. At least, the one in the Shashidharan- Bhatia family, certainly does. Hence, the two different fish curries—one cooked in the fiery Malayali style; the other with the distinctive flavour of North India.
After all, if food is celebration, it is also homage to one’s roots and an expression. Rohan loves coconut; being a North Indian, Shristi doesn’t much care for it.
But, as they say, when love happens, the ties that bind us easily overcome the differences that delineate one from the other.
While the identities may have converged in this household with a half-Malayali and half Assamese husband and a Sindhi wife, it is an enhancement to both their lives. What’s more, it happened without a fuss. While Rohan comes from a cosmopolitan fauji background and is no stranger to intercultural marriages thanks to his parents, Shristi’s parents too were happy to accept their daughter’s choice.
“At the end of the day, it is important to understand each other and people, and care for each other’s family,” says Rohan. In other words, shared values add up.
Back to the beginning
Rohan and Shristi met at the workplace— namely the Gallagher insurance brokerage firm. “It was my first job, and he was a senior. I was impressed by how kind and helpful he was,” reminisces Shristi.
On his part, Rohan liked how genuine and truthful she was. “It’s a quality that makes her stand out from the crowd,” he says.
Gradually, the comfort level and conversations progressed as they both enjoyed each other’s company. Movies, outings, and dinners were a natural outcome of the burgeoning friendship. “Our relationship evolved pretty organically,” says Rohan. “We became firm friends and that is the beginning of any lasting equation.”
In due course, it made sense to take things to the logical level— marriage. “Everything happened so seamlessly and naturally—no one formally proposed to anyone. It was simply understood,” grins Shristi. And so, the duo was wed in 2017 after five years of dating amidst a fun- filled celebration.
From strength to strength
As of today, Rohan works as a deputy manager with the UK-based company called Marsh McLennan, an insurance brokerage firm. Shristi is a team manager with Gallagher and is into quality and audit. Life is demanding and hectic, but also interesting. It’s a time as demanding as it is exciting, what with technology being both the game-changer and learning curve. From picking up the basics of ChatGPT and Millenia to getting back to work full-time after the lull of Covid, there’s a lot happening on every level. Both are committed corporate professionals giving each day their all.
So, do they manage the all-important work life balance? “Well, hours are hectic,” concedes Rohan. But the duo manages to spend lots of time together on the weekend over cups of coffee and conversation. “Honestly, we aren’t the type to seek excitement in partying. Spending time together is the best way to unwind. We share anecdotes at work—he guides me and tells me how to stand up for myself. He has practical solutions to every emotional situation. We talk about our hopes and dreams. That’s time well-spent as far as we are concerned,” expresses Shristi.
Of course, Rohan also loves to pack in a cricket match given his love for the sport. “We follow this up with dinner and a movie,” he says.
Once a year, they do take a vacation, but as both point out—it’s the partner’s company that is the heart of the matter; everything else, just a value addition.
Pillars of a marriage
Given that they’ve both been married for six years and dated for seven, what as per Rohan and Shristi are the pillars of a marriage?
“First and foremost, it’s friendship that is the edifice on which everything else stands. We are very good friends and can easily share things with each other. That’s a big bonus. Next comes respect for each other’s privacy and thoughts. Third, understanding each other, even if one doesn’t completely agree with the other’s stance. Both of us being different personalities, it’s natural to have different viewpoints. Lastly, trust is important as well. Both of us work long hours and meet each other only late in the day. But, when you trust your partner, it smoothens everything else. A naturally corollary of trust would be transparency; we pretty much share everything,” says Rohan.
"First and foremost, it’s friendship that is the edifice on which everything else stands. We are very good friends and can easily share things with each other. That’s a big bonus"
-Rohan Shashidharan
THE MANTRAS OF MARRIAGE
- Shared values
- Communication
- Celebrating differences
- Trust and transparency
- Friendship
- Respect
On her part, Shristi says that space is important in any equation. “There are times when he needs his space, and times when I need mine. Having said that, certain decisions must be made jointly, for the sake of the unit and we must be on the same page for that,” she adds.
Both Rohan and Shristi believe in spending quality time with each other’s parents as well. “We live with his mother, and she’s a great support. Similarly, Rohan too is very close to my parents,” says Shristi.
Like everyone else, this couple too has their share of fights. But communication, says Rohan, is the key to every question. “When you honestly communicate your thoughts and aspirations, your hopes and reservations, it automatically clears up the confusion,” he says. “Both of us have our ups and downs, but one needs to draw the line even when tempers hot up. One person needs to step back and let the other cool down.”
Two’s company for now
As of this moment, both Rohan and Shristi are on an even keel. “We have rewarding careers, and we enjoy spending time together. An addition to the family is some way off,” they round off.