Friends first and last
Chartered accountants by profession, each other’s best friends by disposition. Pooja Khilnani and Saurabh Chheda, have a simple but heartwarming story to tell.
"Find the joy in moments big and small. Do things together, even if it is something as homely as cooking a meal together. Work on your friendship rather than your relationship"
- Pooja Khilnani
Pooja Khilnani and Saurabh Chheda
Love and friendship have a way of overcoming superficial differences to travel the distance-sometimes for life.
Mumbai youngsters Pooja Khilnani and Saurabh Chheda have found this to be true in more ways than one. For beyond the differences of personality, community and appearances, theirs is a relationship that has slowly and steadily gone from strength to strength.
From Mumbai to London, it’s been a long journey, but for this young couple, life and its myriad opportunities are just about beginning. It helps that they both enjoy exploring spaces, geographies, moods, and moments together.
Back to the beginning
This love story was scripted in a leading Mumbai chartered accountancy firm when young intern Pooja Khilnani met her senior Saurabh Chheda. It was a serious & focused environment with both youngsters working long hours over assignments and deadlines. That’s how the seed of understanding were sown. The conversations flowed seamlessly and easily-the differences in their personalities and outlook only served to enhance the association. “She’s calm and composed, most unlike me,” smiles Saurabh. “I wanted to ask her out-but did so indirectly, I dropped a lot of broad hints.”
However, they were both in their early twenties and far too young to marry. “The advantage of dating as ‘kids’ is that you end up dating for a real long time. That helps the relationship in so many ways. Come what may, you are friends, first and last,” says Pooja. However, the families were none too pleased given the difference in their backgrounds. (He’s a Kutchi; She’s a Sindhi.)
While Pooja’s family was fairly cool with the alliance, Saurabh admits his parents had their share of misgivings. “She’s a non-vegetarian, while we are pure veg. These things do make a difference when it comes to day to day existence. Similarly, both cultures are different. She also happens to be taller than me-something that’s perceived to be rather unconventional. But I patiently took my time convincing them,” says Saurabh.
Eventually, the families gave them their blessing. So, the question arises, how easy or tough has the adjustment been? “Honestly, it hasn’t been that tough because my in laws were pretty understanding of the fact that I came from a different background. Plus, I received help in adjusting to the ways of their home and cooking. Over and above all, Saurabh was really there for me. So, it all worked out,” says Pooja. “The comfort factor between us is palpable. I am totally at ease with him. Besides, I know that he is always there to make things right-be it personally or professionally.”
On his part, Saurabh is grateful for her quiet strength and positive outlook. “Like I said, I am the chaotic one, the troublemaker,” he grins. “She really helps keep me grounded. Her positive energy is great.”
He also deeply appreciates her for the family values and commitment to relationships she brings to the table. “Having grown up in a joint family, familial ties and bonds are important to her. Plus, she’s a nice, caring person. These are lovely qualities to have,” he says.
THE MANTRAS OF A MARRIAGE
- Friendship
- Celebrating differences
- Looking at the bigger picture
- Maintaining the fun quotient
London calling
As destiny had it, the duo was meant to build their career abroad, and ended up migrating to London in May 2022 where they work for different firms. While Pooja works with a leading CA firm, Saurabh works for a UK based consultancy firm. “It’s an easier pace of life as compared to India, and therefore, it becomes simpler to maintain work life balance here,” she says.
From cooking and cleaning to chilling by the TV, it’s mostly the two of them and a whole new culture. “I’d like to add here that living abroad successfully would entail letting go of the gender specific roles that we are used to back in India,” expresses Saurabh. “Since there’s no help, we both have to cook, clean and do the laundry. As a guy, honestly, you aren’t doing your wife a favour by helping out on that score. It’s your home and duty as well,” he says.
Ever the travel enthusiasts and outdoor buffs, quality time consists of long walks around parks, eating out and seeing new places. “Weekends are for stepping out,” laughs Pooja. “We just have to be outdoors; there’s no way either of us wants to be home.”
Like every couple, Pooja and Saurabh have their fights too. But, as Saurabh points out, “time and patience have a way of sorting things out. Sure, each one has their ups and downs as a couple. But the important thing is to look at the larger picture, the greater goal. Not everything needs you to take a stand; let go of trivial matters. That said, I am the one usually apologizing because of my temper. (grins.) Being the quieter one, she takes her time to start talking again, but I can’t stand the tension.”
On her part, Pooja says it’s important for any relationship to maintain the fun quotient. “Find the joy in moments big and small. Do things together, even if it is something as homely as cooking a meal together,” she says. “Over and above all else, my mantra is really simple: work on your friendship rather than your relationship. When you have each other’s back as buddies, everything falls into place eventually.”
Given that they have been married for three years, would they, at any point be willing to start a family? “Absolutely,” says Pooja. “We love kids and would definitely want our own. But the timing has to be right. At the moment, though, it’s time to explore London, life and our careers,” she rounds off.