Togetherness conquers all

Pune couple, Yogini Gawali Jogdand & Pravin Jogdand on how a ping led to a full-fledged conversation, a three-year courtship, and then the journey of a lifetime. A bonny two-year-old completes the little family

Yogini Gawali Jogdand and Pravin Jogdand

For all the cons of the world wide web, it allows you to meet up with people you’d have never met otherwise. A huge advantage when it comes to matters of the heart-especially if you haven’t quite met your soulmate in college.

In 2014, when management professional Pravin Jogdand decided to register on a matrimonial website just to see if there was anyone out there for him, he didn’t expect a lot. “I just wanted to see how this would work out at a friend’s suggestion,” he reminisces.

A resident of Beed in the interiors of Maharashtra, the hard-working young man had come to Pune for studies and then work. Pursuing an MBA and then looking for work hadn’t left him time to meet the girl of his choice. And that’s why his friend figured the internet was his best chance.

As it turns out, a month later, the suggestion worked out just fine. “I was just preparing to retire for the night when I got a message from a certain designer called Yogini Gawali,” he says.

Five minutes later, they were chatting. So wonderfully did the duo hit off that the telephonic conversation lasted all night long. They decided to meet up-and the rest was just meant to be.

“We gelled really well. He is easy to talk to, patient and mature. I just knew it would work out,” says Yogini.

And though matrimonial websites are the very heart and soul of arranged marriages, the duo decided to do things their own way and take their time getting to know each other.

“We chose our own partner, dated for a good three years, took our time. That’s a love marriage,” laughs Pravin. “I am lucky to have met Yogini when I did. She’s loving, responsible and very caring. The way she looks after my parents and manages our home and finances is just amazing.”

Initially, though, Pravin’s siblings were none too pleased. “They felt that I ought to look for someone else as she would not suit me. However, I knew that she was The One for me,” he says.

A conviction that stood him in good stead because he hails from a traditional set-up where familial ties, relationships and opinions of loved ones count a lot.

“Luckily for us, though, his mom was in our corner. One look at me-and she declared that I was the right choice for her son,” grins Yogini. “Here, I would especially like to mention my admiration for this very practical, wise and progressive woman who happens to be my motherin-law. She has always supported me-especially the fact that I had an unconventional profession like designing and running my own business. Unlike a job that would entail fixed hours, a business had no set boundaries of time. But she is all for a woman taking charge of her life and has always motivated me to pursue my dreams.”

Obviously, Pravin seems to have taken his cues from his mom, considering how positive he is about backing his wife-whether it is in matters of child-care and housework or switching professional tracks. (Yogini is now a designer employed with UX.) As a senior billing analyst with Adenza, his work is quite demanding too. But he is determined to be the supportive husband indeed, and not just word. “Honestly, household responsibilities are not just a woman’s job. The recent crisis on the backdrop of the pandemic proved this beyond doubt,” he says. “Both genders have to pull their weight and do their share around the house.”

"Honestly, dating and meeting up over coffee is vastly different from staying together 24x7 as a married couple. The responsibilities are many, the canvas of duties is wider. It now encompasses family, bills, chores and a lot more"

- Yogini Gawali Jogdand

THE MANTRAS OF MARRIAGE

• Shared responsibilities
• Patience and maturity
• Celebrating differences

The building blocks of a marriage

Considering they have been married for five years, what according to both, are the pillars of a marriage? “I would say understanding and sharing responsibilities,” says Pravin.

On her part, Yogini says it’s important to give married life enough time to settle down. “Honestly, dating and meeting up over coffee is vastly different from staying together 24x7 as a married couple. The responsibilities are many, the canvas of duties is wider. It now encompasses family, bills, chores and a lot more. This is a delicate balance to achieve. Much like a clay pot that needs to be shaped and baked with due diligence and effort,” she expresses.

Like every couple, they fight as well. “I am the hot-tempered one whereas he is the quiet, patient one who doesn’t seem to respond. And that’s quite the anti-climax. How long can you keep up a one-sided fight?” laughs Yogini.

Jokes apart, both believe in getting to the root of a problem instead of reacting to harsh words in the heat of the moment. “When you understand what actually is at the bottom of the problem, you are able to correct it,” says Pravin.

Quality time for both would consist of treks, movies, short holidays and the most looked forward to the time in the day: post 7:30 pm when their toddler Dhruv is asleep. “For young parents, it’s natural to organise one’s time and day around the little one. But it’s equally important to earmark some time for one’s spouse,” says Yogini.

Bringing up baby

Life is hectic but happy, revolving as it does, around a naughty two-year-old. “But investing the first few months in building a routine for him has worked out well for us. It gives us breathing space and allows us to achieve that all-important work-life balance,” says Yogini.

Though it’s early days yet, Dhruv is showing an inclination for dancing and water. “Honestly, we don’t know what he is meant to do in the future as yet. But one thing is clear: neither of us believes in pushing him into the rut of studies and academics only. It’s important for him to love what he does, and we are here to support him all the way,” rounds off Pravin.