Distance makes the heart grow fonder

It is not often these days that a college romance fructifies into wedlock. Corporate Citizen unlocks the story of love that has culminated into marriage, for we believe in the stability of a relationship and family unit. We bring to you real-life romances that got sealed in marriage

Dedicated careerists and die-hard romantics, Damini Oberoi and Prateek Virendra Swarup, walk the talk when it comes to proving that ambition and a happy married life may indeed co-exist. Even as they share hospitality as a core professional background, both are chasing their own dreams. While he is Head Operations at Udaipur’s uber swanky hotel, The Leela Palace, she owns her own event management company-Q Events and Weddings. A long distance marriage, for the moment, is the way it goes, with him in Udaipur and her in Pune. Not a big issue, they say, not with love and understanding as the cornerstone of their relation

She had been expecting him to pop the question for some time now. After all, their relationship had only gone from strength to strength: from being co-students at Pune’s Symbiosis College of Arts and Commerce College to being close friends to gradually emerging as each other’s choice of a life partner, it had been a long-standing association in more ways than one.

What she wasn’t quite expecting was either the timing or manner. “She was visiting me in Udaipur with her best friend. I showed them around the hotel where I work, as best as I could. As part of the first surprise, I told them there was a spa booked for both of them. After that session, when they were expecting to step out for a casual dinner, they were amazed to see a very special alcove by the lake under the stars, set for three. As planned, I was supposed to join both of them for dinner,” narrates Prateek.

Half-way through the dinner, he excused himself for a few minutes. “My team quickly helped me into a tuxedo, and then, equipped with flowers and a ring, I went back to the table, and before her happily weeping friend, asked her to marry me,” he smiles.

As far as elaborate proposals go, this one is hard to beat: moonlight and roses at The Leela Palace, inarguably one of the most romantic destinations in the country with the softly lapping waters of the historic lake Pichola as a witness.

“It was the most beautiful surprise ever,” she says.

“Look, it was a feat indeed to impress a lady who is an event management professional and well-versed with the finer points of creating memories...” he smiles. “It took imagination, planning and some fancy footwork. But I think I acquitted myself quite well.”

Surprises, clearly, are a wonderful thing, even in rock-solid relationships.

Back to the beginning

This story was first scripted in Pune’s Symbiosis College of Arts and Commerce College. “She was a few batches junior,” he narrates. Post their graduation, he chose to pursue his Master’s in Hospitality at The Oberoi School of Learning and Development, while she made her attempt at being an entrepreneur in the catering business. Despite the differences in basic personality, there was much common ground: a shared interest in the fine art of hospitality, a deep love for the city of Pune (where they have both grown up-despite Prateek’s parents currently living in Delhi) and lots of mutual friends.

While he admires her unshakeable calm and immense patience, she loves his clear-sightedness and articulate ways. “He is the perfect sounding board for moments when the going gets confusing, gifted as he is with the ability of separating wheat from the chaff with ease. He will recount the pros and cons of the choices available and present things so simply that you wonder what the fuss was all about,” she expresses.

But it wasn’t love at first sight. Instead, the relationship took its time progressing to each new level. “When I started my career in the operational side of hotels, I got an opportunity to travel to different cities. This would give my friends the perfect excuse to plan a getaway to come to visit me. Damini was one of them, someone dear and cherished, but there wasn’t any notion of romance yet,” he shares.

Things took a turn when she visited him in Mussoorie-where he was part of the team to set up the nascent unit of Hotel JW Marriot. “We shared a wonderful few days; her companionship was flawless, we gelled so well and had a lot to talk about,” he says. “So much so that when she returned to Pune I realized I was missing her way more than I had ever expected to.” Ever the realists, they realized that the one way of ensuring a rock-solid partnership in the days to come would be to get to know each other’s parents well. “Parental support and blessings are a major plus for any young couple,” he says.

Not even the difference in cultural backgrounds: she’s half-Punjabi and half Sardar whereas he is a Kayasth from UP. Combining the best of both cultures, the duo had a gorgeous destination wedding in Goa with both a Sikh and Hindu ceremony amongst other festivities. “It was important for us to have all our favorite people with us, and also make them feel included in our special day. So we gave due weightage to both the Hindu and Sikh rituals,” they say.

"It was important for us to have all our favorite people with us, and also make them feel included in our special day"

The Mantras of Marriage

• Respecting each other’s dreams
• Giving each other space
• Making the most of moments together
• Celebrating differences
• Appreciating one another, in word and deed.

Moods, moments n
magic: Damini and Prateek

The pillars of a marriage

Post-marriage, both have been working in Udaipur and Pune respectively. Long hours and demanding clients are part and parcel of their work. So doesn’t the pressure ever get to them? “Not really,” she says. “For starters, both of us are very passionate about what we do, so that helps. Besides, both of us are equally supportive of each other’s career graphs. While he understands the rough and tumble of entrepreneurship, I can totally relate to the pressures of running a luxury hotel. The fact that both of us are from the same core, field hospitality is a big plus for us. I don’t think anyone from a different background would have related so seamlessly to the other’s problems.”

Quality time included quick trips to Pune and Udaipur-with the couple making it a point to spend at least a week together per month. Short trips, long drives and movies go a long way in making up for the lost time. As do the difficult moments when a particular client is giving them a hard time. “Instead of taking it out on each other, what we do is gossip about the situation together,” laughs Damini. “It helps us bond better.”

Fights happen, but given her calm nature and his reasonable ways, they don’t really fester. “I am someone pretty non-confrontational, and he is someone pretty analytical. The trick is to get to the bottom of the conflict and figure out what exactly it is about and why,” she says.

Like every young couple, they have discussed the prospect of starting a family, but haven’t quite decided if and when they want to commit to a baby. “We both love children, and totally understand that they are a big responsibility. Which is why, whether or not we decide to have them, our reasons have to be rock-solid and convincing to our own selves,” rounds off Prateek.