We need to practice the art of forgiveness if we wish to restore our relationships. No emotional hurt can be unforgivable. With a little effort, we can put them behind us to give effect to a reconciliation with our loved ones and friends, thus restoring peace within our minds and hearts
Mother Teresa once said, People ask me what advice I have for a married couple struggling in their relationship. I always answer, pray and forgive. To young people from violent homes, I say, pray and forgive. And, even to a single mother with no family support, I say, pray and forgive.
Any relationship between couples, parents and children, siblings, friends or colleagues involves two people, two human beings, neither of which is perfect. To err is human, as we all know. We have our sins of omission and commission, through which we hurt each other. Just think of all the actions that strain a relationship-lying, cheating, indifference, apathy, shirking our responsibility, shifting the blame on to the other person, use of abusive language, violence and betrayal. Alas, the bitter truth is that all this happens, not between strangers, but between two people who are very close to each other. Such acts cause emotional injuries, which do not heal easily and relationships are jeopardised.
We need to practice the art of forgiveness if we wish to restore our relationships. No emotional hurt can be unforgivable. With a little effort, we can put them behind us to give effect to a reconciliation with our loved ones and friends, thus restoring peace within our minds and hearts.
Forgiveness, as in contrast to retaliation, is not an instinctive or spontaneous impulse. If we are hurt, almost as a reflex, we are conditioned to think: I'll fight back, I'll do to you what you did to me. On the other hand, forgiveness has to be cultivated. It is a well considered, well-thought out emotional choice that we make to forgive freely, those who have hurt us. For as we all realise, forgiveness does not just consist of mouthing the words, "I forgive you." It involves letting go of anger, resentment, hurt and bitterness. It allows us to heal the other and be healed ourselves in the process.
Forgiveness has to be cultivated. It is a well-considered, well-thought out emotional choice that we make to forgive
Every day we face the need to forgive a spouse, a parent, a child, a colleague, a friend, a neighbour, or even a perfect stranger. This is no easy task. People find it is easier to forgive a stranger or an acquaintance than to forgive a friend or relative, someone whom we know and trust. At such times, we can only tell ourselves that in the end, we are not responsible for what others do to us but only for what we do to them.
There is another important fact that we often overlook in emotional disputes with those who are close to us. Rarely is a dispute one-sided. Somewhere, somehow, we have a share in what we regard as an offence against ourselves. However, in our grief and hurt, we become blind to our own faults, while we magnify the faults of others. A little reflection, a period of calm introspection and a little humility will set the balance right.
The Moment of Calm is a worldwide peace initiative that aims at bringing calm in the hearts of people through the power of forgiveness. There can be no world peace without peace in the heart.
Young and old, individuals and organisations join the Moment of Calm on August 2 at 2 pm by observing two minutes silence and forgiving those who have wronged them. The simple act of forgiving and removing negative emotions of anger and hatred from hearts can raise world consciousness and generate powerful positive vibrations that will envelope the planet with love and peace.
The Moment of Calm has received tremendous support and enthusiasm from individuals from all walks of life. In 2016, over 18.2 million people participated from across the globe, including Morocco, UAE, UK, USA, Spain, India, Singapore, South America, South Africa, China and Taiwan. All are invited to join this growing wave of peace. To sign up, ‘Like’ www.facebook. com/momentofcalm or visit www. momentofcalm.org.
The Moment of Calm marks the birth time of a leading spiritual luminary of India – Rev Dada J P Vaswani, who believes, ‘The best giving is forgiving.’
Date: August 2, 2017
Time: 2 pm for 2 mins
By Dada J P Vaswani
