As the saying goes, the speeding bullet and the spoken word can never be taken back and we all need to be mindful to communicate with care and after some thoughtful deliberation in these days of instant responses through multiple media
Nothing gives one as much satisfaction as the joy of having sixty of your best friends come from all parts of the country and some from outside India to celebrate a special occasion with you. And on a lovely August evening in Pune, three score plus friends actually decided to make me feel special a month after my birthday. Basking in the love and fraternity we enjoyed that evening, it would be easy to walk down memory lane and talk about people who came, sang and danced with us and the love that flowed throughout as old bonds of friendship were renewed and new partnerships struck. But what would be more useful is to reflect on a world where friendship and camaraderie is being replaced by social media and divisiveness and rediscover the Zen of love and friendship!
Think of this-would any of the crazy reality shows on the global stage that are breaking all around us have happened if there had been a genuine willingness to eschew hatred and arrogance and work on building relationships? The unfortunate Infosys dramas that have been hitting the newspapers and television screens with alarming regularity over the last year came to a head with the resignation of CEO Vishal Sikka. The build-up to the saga started after a weak business period and the appointment of KV Kamath as Chairman. Vishal Sikka was appointed, the promoter-CEO relationship slowly declined and a Board which had big names on it failed to really play its role in keeping the hostilities out of the Press. After relationships broke down between the promoters, the Board and the former CEO and other shareholders and a three-day loss of over 33,000 crores of market value hit the headlines, the appointment of veteran Infoscion and industry stalwart Nandan Nilekani might prove to be the balm that heals many wounds, but surely, we could have prevented matters from getting to this crisis. Could mature people not have used personal relationships to come up with a constructive partnership in the interest of all stakeholders in an iconic Indian company?
In the USA, after failing to adequately condemn the Charlottesville incidents, President Trump made an amazing ninety-minute speech in Phoenix Arizona where he harangued against the “crooked Press” and deepened the fissures in an increasingly divisive nation. Things have come to such a pass that the two Coasts are at emotional and political loggerheads with the loyal Trump followers and it is almost impossible to predict the end to a drama that is seeing a new and unpleasant climax almost every week. Hopefully, it is not going to be a Greek tragedy for the US, which has for decades been the true champion of the free world!
In the midst of these national and international storms, a word of praise for one man who has really demonstrated that he knows what it takes – collaboration and friendship, to get things done. Pune Municipal Commissioner Kunal Kumar recently completed three years in office. I recall meeting him with MP Vandana Chavan at the inauguration of a Digital Literacy Centre in Pune soon after he took office. Enthused by the Digital Literacy Mission he exhorted us to do more for the city. The wheels that were set in motion for us at Pune City Connect have seen Digital Literacy, Skills Lighthouses and Municipal School Transformation go to new heights and we have always known that we a friend in Kunal like we have always had in Vandana, who will help in doing whatever can be done collaboratively for the good of the city and the country.
What can one learn from all this, for our own society and families? There are ample provocations happening all around us and it would be easy to adopt an “I’m OK you are not OK” stance which all of us tend to do at times. A nasty e-mail or WhatsApp message sent in the heat of anguish can set off a sequence of words and deeds, which take relationships to a precipice. As the saying goes, the speeding bullet and the spoken word can never be taken back and we all need to be mindful to communicate with care and after some thoughtful deliberation in these days of instant responses through multiple media.
And finally, back to the friendship theme, a big shout out for my business school mates who came from Dubai, Muscatn Hyderabad, Mumbai and even Pune to enjoy the friendship evening and celebrate our bonds of over thirty-five years. Dev Bhattacharya, a classmate and friend for decades, who was one of the comperes, singers and dancers of the evening said, “We all go back a long way and have many stories we cannot tell and some we will relish always.” Isn’t that what friendship is all about? Let’s not forget that when all is done and dusted, we will be remembered not by the epitaphs on our tombstones but the thoughts words and deeds we have shared with truly good friends on the planet!
Think of this−would any of the crazy reality shows on the global stage that are breaking all around us have happened if there had been a genuine willingness to eschew hatred and arrogance and work on building relationships?
Ganesh Natarajan
