It is not often these days that a college romance fructifies into a wedlock. Corporate Citizen unlocks the story of love that has culminated into marriage, for we believe in the stability of a relationship and family unit. We bring to you real-life romances that got sealed in marriage
Corporate professionals Ajitaa and Bimal Rath on the importance of supporting your spouse through the demands of work, home, a nuclear set-up and a very young child. “If you understand and support each other, everything falls in place,” they say
At the end of a hard day at work--the Raths like to unwind by watching Masterchef series on TV—and replicating the dishes as closely as possible. A tall order that one, given that Masterchef is a show dedicated to the nuances of professional cooking--but that does not bother Bimal and Ajitaa. For them, it’s just about seizing the moment.
A simple mantra that helps the young couple, balance the various demands of their work and family life—a young child, and assorted stresses. Currently based in Delhi, both have fairly busy schedules. While Bimal (32) is deputy manager at National Housing Bank (NHB), a wholly-owned subsidiary of the Reserve Bank of India (RBI), Ajitaa (34) is manager (HR) at Yum Restaurants (the company that owns Pizza Hut.) Amidst all this, they take turns to attend to their four-year -old son Viraaj—and be as hands on as possible.
“Sure, the corporate world is a tough act to follow. But if you understand and support your spouse—respect their dreams—and help out wherever possible, it’s completely possible to enjoy a healthy family life with your career,” expresses Bimal. “I would also highly recommend really getting to know your spouse before marriage, in case of a love marriage like ours. We knew each other with our pluses and minuses and that was a good start.”
This particular college romance was scripted bit by bit over the two years of academic life. Both alumni of BIMM, Bimal was studying marketing, and Ajitaa, HR.
“I think our first meeting was all thanks to Bala sir’s induction programme. Having been active right through my school and college days on stage, the presentation part was a breeze for me. A lot of other students—including Ajitaa asked me to help out with theirs.”
“We both had a common friend— and hung out together,” reminisces Bimal. Bit by a bit, the association grew. Through lunches and movies, spending time together and taking on the various challenges of a hectic MBA programme.”
“He is frank, logical, rational and impartial. I really appreciate that about him,” says Ajitaa.
For his part, Bimal appreciates her spontaneity and down-to-earth attitude, despite coming from a fairly privileged background.
But it was only during his summer internship with LG Electronics that Bimal realised he was missing a “special someone.”
He confided his feelings to her; she turned him down. “I turned him down several times, to be honest,” smiles Ajitaa. “We both belonged to different communities—I am a Bihari (Kayastha) while he is an Odiya Brahmin—and I did not see our parents readily agreeing to the match.”
Not one to give up, Bimal suggested the matter rest until they both found suitable jobs.
And sure enough, even as they did, he took up the matter with his parents. “They were not pleased; they had several doubts as to whether it would work out given our cultural differences.
“A strong and supportive spouse is absolutely essential for a woman professional to do justice to her work. I am pretty lucky in that regard” — Ajitaa
Her parents, on the other hand, despite their initial reservations, came around relatively sooner. “They wondered how I would adjust in his home, in the face of so many differences. But one meeting with Bimal—and my dad was convinced that he was right for me,” says Ajitaa.
In fact, her parents made a trip to the Rath home to convince his parents. It worked.
An elaborate wedding ceremony combining the finer aspects of both Bihari and Odiya traditions followed in November 2009. “The various ceremonies were conducted over several days, and everything worked out very well,” they share.
“Yes, there have been a few adjustments to be made post-marriage,” admits Ajitaa. “Our cultural backgrounds are different; his mother is a traditional lady, but if you accept a few changes with grace, it works out better.”
Both work long hours, and travel frequently. “We manage with the help of reliable help—and each other’s support, of course,” says Bimal, who is also fairly savvy around the house.
“A strong and supportive spouse is absolutely essential for a woman professional to do justice to her work. I am pretty lucky in that regard,” says Ajitaa.
Bimal is also fairly conscious about balancing family time with work. “Making the switch to a government sector job from a private sector set up in Kotak Mahindra was a tough call. But I made it for several reasons—not only would it be a valuable career move in the years to come, but it would also bring me more time with my family,” he says. “Spending time together is essential, no matter how busy we might be.”
To that end, the couple makes it a point to go out for dinner dates—once or twice a month— alone. “We really look forward to this time alone,” says Ajitaa. Saturdays and Sundays are also strictly earmarked as family time—during which they make it a point not to take calls or attend to work-related issues. When differences arise— inevitably—it is always wise for one partner to back off till the other one has cooled down, says Bimal. “Whatever you do, don’t let the negativity fester; apologise, talk it out--and get on with it,” he says. Parenting is another important arena of teamwork. “Roles are carefully divided—to the extent that we spend the maximum time with Viraaj,” says Ajitaa.
“Both discipline and love have to be carefully balanced. To that extent, I am the more strict parent—and she, the more relaxed one,” says Bimal.
Apart from this, both share common interests, including biking and photography. Bimal isa budding photographer with interest in animal, bird and nature photography and also goes on long rides with Ajitaa on their Royal Enfield.
“I am proud of the fact that I am possibly one of the few women who can ride a Royal Enfield,” grins Ajitaa. “And I am a good apprentice when it comes to photography.”
“We have similar tastes—be it in food, clothing or hobbies. That’s a plus for us,” shares Bimal.
Ajitaa did take a break after their son was born—but was soon back at work. “I believe she has a lot of potential to do well, and back her in every way,” says Bimal. “In fact, I have my share of dreams for her—and she has her dreams for me. That’s how it ought to be.”
By Kalyani Sardesai
