Winning Together

Sports psychologist turned Pilates professional Liyaan Akkalkotkar and IT recruitment entrepreneur Rahul Harpalani, met on the football field, reconnected across continents, and finally found their way to each other through patience and timing. Now married, this young Pune couple channels the discipline, teamwork and resilience they learned from competitive sports into building their businesses, navigating an inter-cultural marriage, and creating a life rooted in friendship, mutual respect and shared dreams

Sports taught us that timing is everything," says Rahul Harpalani. "You can't force it. You have to wait for the right moment, trust the process, and when that moment comes: you go for it." He could be talking about football. But, he's actually describing how he and his wife Liyaan Akkalkotkar finally found their way to each other after years of near-misses, long distances, and life getting in the way.

A mutual passion for sports brought this couple together. It was precisely this enduring love of the game that fueled their conversation each time they kept bumping into each other: at the football academy run by Liyaan's father, on the fields of Pune's Bishops' Junior College where they both happened to be enrolled, in the stands of various sporting tournaments. Slowly, what began as casual 'Hi and Hello' metamorphosed into a deeper friendship.

"Liyaan played tennis at the national level, while I'm a footballer," shares Rahul. "Sports is a huge part of our lives. It means fun, discipline, purpose and passion."

Given that they were in college together, it was only a matter of time before the star footballer and the star female athlete were linked together. "We just laughed it off," smiles Liyaan. This, even though both their families knew each other well and Rahul was great friends with Liyaan's brother.

With good reason, it would seem. Disciplined and focused on their studies and careers, neither had any idea where their young lives would take them. After Bishop’s, Rahul went to Romania where he played football professionally for three years.

"Eventually, though, as it happened, we both landed up in the United Kingdom for higher studies," she says. "I pursued an MSc in Sports Psychology while he opted for an MSc in Sports Management."

THE MANTRAS OF MARRIAGE

• Friendship first
• Shared passion and hobbies
• Mutual support and cheerleading
• Communication and patience
• Respecting different conflict styles
• Financial partnership

Though they connected instantly and the conversation flowed seamlessly, both were nevertheless not ready to commit. "We liked each other, yes. But, we still didn't know our respective paths," says Liyaan. Clearly, both had much living, learning and working to do. While Rahul stayed back in London, Liyaan returned to India and worked for two years in Bengaluru as a sports psychologist.

The right timing, finally

But then, the pandemic hit and Liyaan came back home to Pune. Even in that tough time, life had a silver lining in store for them. "One of the first things I did when lockdown was lifted was to hit the football ground with my friends," reminisces Liyaan. To her surprise, she bumped into Rahul there.

Although neither had been in touch for some time, the reconnection was instantaneous. As the duo messaged and chatted, they finally had the clarity that had been elusive thus far: they had a future together and wanted their parents to know

"We did wonder how our families would react since it's an inter-cultural match," says Liyaan.

As it turned out, convincing the folks wasn't such a hard thing to do. The friendship and camaraderie of years between the families was solid enough foundation upon which to build a home. Amidst much cheering and celebration, both sets of parents gave the young couple their blessing and they were finally wed in December 2022.

From strength to strength

As things stand today, Liyaan is a soughtafter Pilates instructor. Years of having played different sports and a deep understanding of the human body and psychology, has given the young professional an edge. On his part, Rahul now runs his very own IT recruitment firm. Both live in a nuclear setup, not far from their respective parents and families.

Life is hectic but happy, even as they juggle work commitments with an equally hectic social life. "You see, we were amongst the first in our circle of friends to get married. So, our home is quite the central point for everyone to meet, chat and get together," grins Liyaan.

Nevertheless, both are particular about setting aside time exclusively for themselves. "To that end, we just take off on a long road trip together. We spend that time just catching up and having a good laugh," he says. Then, of course, there are the football and tennis matches they love playing and watching together.

How challenging has the inter-cultural adjustment been for both? "It takes time to understand each other's way of life," says Rahul. "Living together is very different from dating."

What helps, though, is communication, time and patience. "Talking to family, taking the time to understand certain rituals and practices are key. For both, you need patience and a willingness to learn," expresses Liyaan. "But, as the elders rightly say: it gets better, bit by bit."

The playbook for marriage

Both are clear that the pillars of marriage are as old as time. "Trust, mutual respect, patience, understanding and communication," says Rahul. "Above all, it is important to be each other's cheerleaders through thick and thin. Motivating and supporting each other through the tough patches is what companionship is all about."

Like every couple, Rahul and Liyaan have their share of disagreements too. "The important thing to understand as well as accept is that the way your partner processes and resolves conflict is different to yours," says Liyaan. "For instance, I need to talk things out there and then. But, Rahul needs his time before he's ready to discuss things."

At the end of the day, though, their longstanding friendship is the glue that binds them together. "There is nothing that we cannot talk to each other about," says Rahul. "So that definitely helps."

As does a mutual focus and commitment to the life they are building together. "We are young and there is a lot of work to do," says Liyaan. "Both of us are focused and goaloriented and we're on the same page."

Consistency and hardwork are at the root of every tree that gives shade, whether it's Rahul's recruitment firm or Liyaan's Pilates practice. "There will be ups and downs, life is never straightforward but one has to keep forging ahead," smiles Rahul.

"Talking to family, taking the time to understand certain rituals and practices are key. For both, you need patience and a willingness to learn. But, as the elders rightly say: it gets better, bit by bit "

— Liyaan Akkalkotkar

On her part, Liyaan is a firm advocate of financial independence for women. "I don't believe that finances are a man's responsibility alone," she avers. To that end, both are busy hustling, building and managing the all-important work-life balance. So, no expansion to the family, just yet. "However, we will be ready for parenthood eventually," grins Rahul. "We both love children and value family. The love of near and dear ones is what brought me back from the UK, when dad passed away."

Liyaan couldn't agree more. "Family matters. That's something sports teaches you too - you're only as strong as your team."

And for this couple, being on the same team means everything.