Love of One's Fate

When life refuses to bend, acceptance becomes a quiet rebellion that steadies the mind and softens the blows

The Latin phrase Amor fati, denote an unusual attitude in human beings. This means ‘Love of one’s fate’. It is used to describe an outlook in which one sees everything that happens, including suffering and loss, as necessary. Whether one likes them or not, they are accepted with Zen-like serenity. It is adherence to this attitude that may ensure success; deviation from it seldom does.

The fire that tested Edison’s spirit

In this context, consider the story about Thomas Edison, a scientist and innovator known for a huge number of inventions and patents. Edison was at home having dinner when a man burst in with terrible news—his research facility was on fire. All of Edison’s experiments—some things that could never be replicated—were inside the laboratory, burning to the ground. How would you imagine Edison reacted? Do you picture him panicking, screaming “Why me?”, distraught or in deep agony?

None of these happened. Edison asked his son to fetch his mother. Then he told his wife, “Don’t worry. It is all right. All my mistakes and a lot of unnecessary rubbish have just burnt.” In this he revealed the true nature of Amor Fati — choosing to love your fate, no matter what. He was not broken-hearted; rather, he was revitalised. Despite losing over one million dollars in that fire at the age of 67, he focused and went on to make ten million dollars.

Why loving one’s fate changes everything?

The power of loving and accepting our fate is so immense that you feel nothing is impossible. This soon makes you believe everything has a purpose, and that it is up to us to make that purpose positive and active. The challenges of life may be considerable and unstable, but we are given the choice to greet them with a smile and then act constructively — that is Amor fati. One must feel positive and strong about what happens. If it happened, then it was meant to happen, and one must make the best of it.

Some people, when faced with failure, become frustrated and incapacitated; others accept failure with a smile and start afresh with more energy. The attitude of those in the second category makes them succeed.

There are many stories of success after failure. A few are illustrated below:

Abraham Lincoln: He was the 16th President of the United States from 1861 until his assassination in 1865. He lost many elections early in life, but he fought on and ultimately won the greatest responsibility of all.

Albert Einstein: He was a slow learner to begin with and faired below average in some examinations. He accepted his fate with a smile and worked to transform himself, ultimately becoming one of the greatest scientists the world has ever produced.

Steve Jobs: He became one of the most talented innovators in the world and created the company Apple. He began with setbacks — he dropped out of college, felt formal education had limited value for him, and travelled to India in search of gurus for peace of mind. He co-founded Apple, was later ousted by his partners, founded another company, and ultimately returned to Apple, to make it a global force. During his early days his financial condition was so poor that he depended on free food at an Hare Krishna temple in America for a time.

J.K. Rowling: From multiple rejections to enormous success, Rowling rose from poverty as a single mother working under great difficulty. Publishers rejected the manuscript that went on to become a sevenbook fantasy series; today she is one of the richest authors and a noted philanthropist.

Walt Disney: A pioneer in animation and entertainment, creator of Mickey Mouse and founder of Disneyland, he was once fired from a newspaper for being told he “lacked imagination”.

Oprah Winfrey: Fired from her first job as a television news anchor — deemed “unfit for TV” — she went on to become one of the most famous personalities in media.

Colonel Sanders: Rejected by almost 1,000 restaurants, he started his venture at the age of 65 with just $100 in social-security funds. He persisted and KFC became a global brand.

Steven Spielberg: Now regarded as one of the most influential film-makers in cinema history, he was rejected multiple times by the University of Southern California film school.

Amitabh Bachchan: A superstar of Indian cinema, reached his peak, but then his company ABCL became bankrupt. Tax authorities pursued him and his properties were at risk of attachment. At an older age he started afresh on television; his quiz show Kaun Banega Crorepati became a super hit and is successfully running for many years. He again received film offers of his choosing and numerous endorsements — money returned to him in abundance.

Michael Jordan: The basketball legend was initially cut from his high-school team. His coach did not think he was good enough, but instead of giving up he trained harder.

Great lives shaped by early failure

There are many such stories. Failures and painful incidents regularly occur in our lives. In fact, failures are stepping stones to success. Pain often precedes a happier, more contented life. The deciding factor between pain and happiness, between failure and success, is the individual’s attitude. This is what the Latin phrase ‘Amor Fati’ means. One is never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream. Changing one’s mindset is a game changer. Two things define you: your patience and your attitude.

Lessons from our scriptures and the journey of Lord Ram

Let us, for a moment, set aside the Latin phrase and draw our attention to our own scriptures. The theme of a successful life is well illustrated by the life of Lord Ram. To begin with, he was the prince of Ayodhya and, a day before his accession as king, he had to leave for vanvās (exile) for 14 years. He smilingly accepted this destiny and endured the ordeals of forest life. He suffered another great pain when Sita was abducted by Ravan. Lord Ram used that period to kill demons who harmed saints, meet great sages and ultimately defeat Ravan. Lord Ram returned after 14 years as ‘Purushottam Ram’, and as king of Ayodhya established ‘Ram Rajya’. His life teaches that even a sad event can be transformed positively, provided one accepts it and moves forward with a constructive attitude. The cutting edge remains one’s outlook.

"The challenges of life may be considerable and unstable. One must feel positive and strong about what happens. If it happened, then it was meant to happen, and one must make the best of it"

When rejection becomes a turning point

A positive attitude at the time of failure or misfortune often proves the turning point to success. A pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. Yesterday should not take too much of today. Failures teach us to evolve; they make us more experienced. We must remember Winston Churchill’s words: “Success is not final; failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts.” Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. This message is especially valuable for young people today.

Failure as the first step, not the final word

We see many students committing suicide when they fail to gain admission to institutions such as the IIM, IIT or medical colleges. We also see farmers taking their own lives after crop failures caused by floods and droughts. These people forget that crop failures are part of agriculture and that their lives should not end because of them. Students, job-seeking youth and farmers should analyse the reasons for their failures, and then work to correct them. A positive attitude is the needed inspiration. There is nothing wrong in dreaming big, but in case of failure we must start afresh with greater enthusiasm. To reach the top floor, we must move step by step, if we slip we must set the target again and try once more. “Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards” — Vernon Sanders law.

We must also remember that the muchneeded ‘positive attitude’ is not always something we are born with; it can be developed. We must have the willpower and the desire to succeed to nurture a ‘positive attitude’. We can always course-correct in our lives. It is never too late.